Last night, as my small group discussed this parable that is so richly textured and layered that you could discuss it for a long time, I learnt new things, new questions and possible answers but also possible challenges to how we might think about the issues. None of these are likely to be new discoveries, and you could probably find them in commentaries by biblical scholars but discussing them in a small group make the arguments come alive and become more robust.
The key is respectful engagement so that points are properly discussed and for us to build up one another in our faith and knowledge. Respect is important because it indicates humility on our part, the admission of the possibility that we just might have something to learn from the other party.
My first 'insight' was regarding the actions of the father. The obvious focus is on his love for his prodigal son and the welcoming back of him to the fold despite his squandering of the inheritance the father had given him. In my latest reading of the parable, this seemingly insignificant line in verse 12, "So he divided his property between them." suddenly came alive for me.
If the father refused the request, the story ends there, or takes a different turn. But God allows us to choose, to believe in Him or not, and even when we stray away from Him, He forgives us if we repent and return to Him. That's what makes the parable work. He loves us enough to give us freedom of choice, and forgives us when we realise our mistakes and repent. (There are other perspectives you can take here, about how we love as parents - we don't always allow our children to make bad choices for instance. I am not giving any inheritance away prematurely that's for sure!)
"Who do we identify with in this parable?" was a powerful question asked by someone. Invariably there will be some who say they identified with the prodigal son. In our journey of faith, many of us face doubts, or face challenges in finding the answers, or sometimes find answers that may not be what we need at the time and we drift away from God.
It is however, more difficult to admit that we may identify with the elder son, who questions the father's judgement because he feels it is unfair. Once we understand the key message of the parable, it feels so uncharitable to say we identify with the elder son, even if we admit to ourselves that we do sometimes feel the same way.
We are called by Christ to love everyone. and the greatest love we can show is to share what God gave us. It is however so natural and tragically human to only love those we feel are deserving, those we like. We forget we are undeserving ourselves, and apply our own rules and standards, like the elder son. He forgets that it is not his decision to make and therefore fairness does not come into it.
In a way, I can identify with both the elder and prodigal son, depending on the period of life, that I am thinking of.
"How do we guard against self-righteousness?" This was a good follow up question as it goes right to the crux of the problem. To my mind, the heart that knows to ask this question is already well equipped to deal with this. The Spirit works in us to open our hearts to the truth, which is that pride is always lurking in the background trying to tell us we are better and more deserving than others. Most of the time, we act and behave according to the norms that society expects of us - many, even non-believers know and live by these norms, even if they do not know that the origins of these norms are rooted in Christ. So it is easy to lapse into the false comfort that we are good and faithful servants simply by behaving as society expects us to. But our heart convicts us, if we have uncharitable thoughts even as we 'act' correctly. As long as we are aware of such moments, we should pray for forgiveness and be secure in the knowledge that God hears our prayers in such circumstances because it is a sign of repentance.
And occasionally we fail to even 'act' correctly - or maybe it is more accurate to say that that may be our real selves. Again, once we are aware have behaved in such a manner and are aware we have sinned, we should return to Christ and seek forgiveness. It is a common (and maybe even trendy at one time) for some to excuse that as being genuine or authentic, that they are not putting on an act. That may be true (sadly) but it is one thing to say that you are not fake (always good), and quite another to be proud (as you can sense sometimes) and not unrepentant.
That's a long-winded answer to the question. I guess in a way, it's my response to some well-meaning answers that revolve around the theme that if your faith is strong, you will be alright (and won't encounter such a situation). And I don't think such answers are helpful. The question quite clearly is from someone who may have felt that way, and worries about falling into that trap again. As believers, we know we are sinners and will stumble occasionally and any answer that suggests that we shouldn't stumble if our faith is strong enough, will cause feelings of personal failure and doubt.
We are called to love, and to me that means really listening in humility and engaging and uplifting the person. Regardless of who that person is.
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